Dating for people with disabilities has always been challenging and this has made them stick to dating other people with disabilities. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t go for able-bodied people too. Most able-bodied people don’t understand what it’s like to date or be with someone with a disability and choose to avoid it.
Getting back to the dating game after becoming disabled can be quite tough as you would find it intimidating even if you were once considered a pro in the dating game. Most people become withdrawn and insecure after getting disabled which could make them consider themselves unfit to date anyone even if the person also has a disability.
Below, we have some tips that will help you start dating again after becoming disabled. These tips will motivate you to take the necessary steps to make the best you can out of your life.
1. Becoming Disabled Will Change Your Dating Life
Before going back to dating, there are some things you need to accept. Becoming disabled will change your dating life and might reduce your chances of finding a potential partner but that doesn’t mean you wouldn’t get the right person. If your needs are realistic, you will be able to find just the right partner that would accept you for who you are.
2. Don’t Hide Your Disability
This is easier for those who do not have physical disabilities, however, it is completely wrong to hide your disability when trying to create a meaningful relationship with someone. Rather, be open about it and tell your partner about your disability.
Never be ashamed or feel insecure when you tell others about your disability, instead own it. Your disability doesn’t change you as a person so you shouldn’t let it define you. Your disability will definitely affect your future relationship with your potential partner or potential friend which makes telling them more important.
3. Don’t Lower Your Standards
There are a lot of negative stereotypes about people with disabilities which make them feel insecure most times of their lives. Being in a public place as someone with a disability would be quite uncomfortable and thus they would consider themselves lucky if they would find a date or a potential partner that would accept their disability.
It is important not to allow your disability to determine who you are and make you lower your standards. Sometimes people with disabilities would lower their standards just to find someone who would accept them, however, such people might simply date them out of pity or be the wrong match for them.
If there are some personality traits you wouldn’t accept in a partner for good reasons, do not lower your standards and start considering those traits just because you have a disability. However, you should also make sure that what you want in a partner is realistic.
4. Start Building Meaningful Relationships First
Before rushing back to dating, you might want to start building meaningful relationships just to get your self-esteem back. You can start off by joining online communities like soulful encounters which promote meaningful relationships with other people whether or not they are disabled.
By just being friends with these people you could build your confidence to get back in the dating game. However, do not rush things or be too desperate to meet with someone. Most people can sense desperation and might take advantage of you or reject you because of it. Ensure you do not lower your standards and make meaningful relationships with only people that can accept you.
5. Try Disabled Dating Sites
Disabled dating sites have made the dating game easier for people with disabilities. Rather than going to a bar or public places with the hope of finding a potential partner, you can sign to a dating site for people with disabilities if you want to date someone with a disability. You can sign up to dating sites like match.com that accept able-bodied and disabled people.
Many disabled dating sites have matching systems that can link you with a potential partner based on your interests and location. You can also decide to search yourself by using their search tools.
When using these sites, your privacy and safety should be paramount. Never share your personal information with someone you meet in the chat room and never be too desperate to meet with someone offline.
6. Brace Up For Rejection
Rejection happens every now and then but for people with disabilities, it would be quite complicated. Most people with disabilities would take rejection quite hard and blame it on their disability. It might be tougher for those who would get anyone they wanted before they became disabled. However, this shouldn’t be a problem if you have built up your self-esteem by building meaningful relationships with able-bodied and other disabled people before you get back to the dating game.
7. Be Realistic
The first tip pointed out that things would be quite different in the world of dating when you are disabled. This makes it a great time to recheck your preferences when it comes to dating. You need to be realistic with what you want in your partner. It is important not to lower your standards because of your disability but it is also important not to raise your hopes too high or get overconfident as you might not be able to handle it well if you get rejected.
Once again, it is better to build meaningful relationships first before getting back into the dating game.
8. You Can Date Anyone
Dating with a disability might sound like you have to date only another person with a disability. However, there are many success stories of people with disabilities who were able to find love and eventually get married to able-bodied people. Dating sites would easily get you linked up with the right partner whether or not the person is disabled and you can make your decision regardless of your disability.
Accepting your disability makes it easier for you to build your self-esteem and gain confidence. Once you have done that, you would see yourself as the person you once were regardless of your disability.